Now I'm even more confused than ever before...

Enigma-"The Eyes of Truth"

We went to visit some artist's studios in Brooklyn yesterday, and I kinda had a mixed reaction from it. I came away from it being somewhat inspired, yet deeply disappointed at the same time. It was nice to see how other people work, or what some of us might possibly doing in our lives further down the road, and we even met a poodle mix that absolutely loved Cory. It was also fun to go to a different part of Brooklyn where I have never been before and to see how people really are outside of class- most people are just so tired during the week that they just seem miserable, so it was nice to see people at least somewhat happy for once!

I was a little discouraged of the fact that there seems to be a set way of doing things if you are an artist in NYC, which is extremely strange for me since you would think that it's really not this way at all. I still don't know what to do with my life, and I honestly have too many interests to just settle for one thing (for instance, I already changed my major three times- I went from a Pre- Dentistry/Biology major, to a History/Sociology major, and now to a Fine Arts major). I'm also really concerned about there being absolutely no intellectual side to this field at all, or at least at SVA it comes off that way. I would like the work that I do to reflect what I'm thinking, or to have a certain message, or to maybe even help people, but it seems like that is not what people are concerned about anymore. I really don't get the point of doing thousands of still lifes or figure drawings just for the hell of it, and it's starting to seem that I'm wasting my money on doing things that have no point to it at all. At least our painting teacher has realized that I have a lot to say due to the fact that I wrote a 5 page statement for our Identity project when other people just wrote a small paragraph. I might have problems with our city project (which we are doing now) since I'm basing it on gentrification, and I could probably easily write a book on that. I'll keep it short for his sake though...

So, at the end of the day, I just got home really confused. Patrick and I were discussing things between studios, and also earlier during previous classes, and we are just both so confused about what to do with our lives. We talked to Danielle a bit, and the thing that came out of the discussion was "What else would we be doing if we weren't doing art?". It seemed to have solved a big chunk of the problem for Patrick, but it just left me wondering about all of the things I could have been doing now. Would a diploma in dentistry hanging on my wall would really leave me satisfied, but would I have gotten any appointments while dressed all in black and having bright neon red hair color (or whatever color hair I had at the moment). Would I have been completely bored studying random parts of history, or could I have helped people with a sociology degree? I could always study those things outside of class, but I just hope that I'm making the right decision by staying at SVA. I'll always have that nagging thought on the back of my mind that maybe I was destined to be involved with something else. At the same time, maybe I shouldn't just settle on one thing, and this might be better in case if something doesn't work out the way that I thought.

I'll just wind up going crazy from all of these thoughts. I'll just become a crazy cat lady and paint portraits of my cats...

HW Hw hw....

For some reason, I was really excited to find out that we were going to be given some artists that would relate to our work. I always like to look for more inspiration since sometimes I get stuck on a particular way of doing things, and I always like to look for other alternatives to create something. I already was looking at some of the artists that were suggested since I was looking at the website for the Brooklyn Museum (they opened the Elizabeth A. Sackler Center for Feminist art there last year and they have an alphabetical listing of the artists and some of their work on their website).

One of the artists I was looking at was Ghada Amer (whom Brittany didn't like). Ghada Amer is an Egyptian multimedia artist who uses embroidery to depict female sexuality. Since she is Muslim, she also deals with how Islam affects woman as well. She has had a hard time showing her art in more conservative settings, and her work is considered extremely controversial in Muslim communities. Many people have problems with female sexuality- for example it's usually considered normal for a man to be sexual, but if a woman talks about it she can be called a "whore" or "easy". The same goes with how many woman want to "save themselves" for the person they are going to marry, yet men can brag about how many women they slept with before the marriage.

I really like her work since she does embroidery, and she is taking a traditional hobby associated with femininity to display a message that many women can relate to. However, one article on her mentioned that it could take up to three months just working on one piece, and that would just drive me nuts. I also liked how delicate her pieces looked, but while looking at them online, it was usually hard to see what each painting consisted of. The work that she does might be what I would like to do on my own, but without being so sexual. For some reason, I don't like overtly sexual things. Maybe because in American culture, sex is almost everywhere but like I said before, it's usually just one sided. I still find her really inspirational since this is the type of art that I'm usually afraid to do but would like to do more of. I usually hate confrontations, so I try to keep political discussions to a minimum. Most people I know either could care less about the world and politics, while others are really conservative. You would think that if we attend a school in a supposed liberal city, most people would have liberal views, but it's not the case in most situations. Since we have been given more freedom in both our painting and drawing classes to experiment and to do art that we like to do, I've started to show a little bit of my views, but I've still held back a lot. This can be seen with our city project in painting class when I said that I was going to base it on the gentrification that has been happening in various cities around the country. I didn't really say anything, but the discussion that occurred kind of resulted in a few hurt feelings in some people. I already know that I can't satisfy everyone, but I'm not the type of person that just goes "oh well".

So anyway...another person that I admire is Judy Chicago. She wasn't on the list, but her "Womanhouse" was. The "Womanhouse" was a Hollywood mansion that was rented by both Judy Chicago and Miriam Schapiro to display various aspects of the female life in each room of the house. Each female artist was given a different room for their art whether it was just a display or a performance. Only women were allowed to come on the first day, which Chicago said had the greatest response to her work. This also reminds me of when I went to the Brooklyn Museum when the Sackler center opened- mostly women were only on that floor, with the occasional husband or boyfriend. Most women were alone or with friends (or maybe even girlfriends and wives) while on the next floor was where many of the men were. I thought it was very strange since not all of the work had to deal with just women, and everyone could have walked away learning something. (Chicago and Shapiro in front of the house when it opened)

(crocheted environment Womb Room) (oddly the only image I can find on Judy Chicago's Menstruation Bathroom- the whole place was just overflowing with "female products"- tampons, pads and even fake blood- I saw the full image during my art history class in the other college I attended)
(sheet closet)

Obviously, this relates to the project that I'm doing since I'm also doing a house, but I'm not solely focusing on sexism. Also, only half of the house will relate to politics and real problems in our world, while the other half is intentionally going to represent a more fantastical side.

And because I want to, here are some pics of Judy Chicago's Dinner Party:
Each setting represents various mythical and historical woman which is now permanently installed in the Brooklyn Museum. Each wing (or side of the table) represents a different time part of history- the first has place settings for various goddesses until Greek and Roman societies, the second wing represents various women present throughout early Christianity to the Protestant Reformation, and the third wing represents women that were involved with the American Revolution, to Suffragists, and various artists. The floor of the installation also has tiles that have the names of 999 influential women throughout history as well. You can see all of the installation online here.
(the setting for Emily Dickinson- each setting contains the same elements, but have various designs- I just love how the plate/vagina just looks so....frilly and feminine)
(setting for Sojourner Truth, shows how each one has a different style to reflect the woman being honored)

I know we were only supposed to choose one artist and put one image....but....I just can't. So I continue with....
Faith Ringgold- born and raised in Harlem, created the Anyone Can Fly Foundation to promote art for African Americans and children. She is very inspirational to me because she has actually done something to help a problem that I have noticed in the art world- most artists that we know of are always male and white. Most art that we see in museums usually cover the same thing, while they only have artifacts from other cultures around the world-such as African jewelry and Incan bowls, but it is extremely rare to have a modern African, Hispanic, Asian artist etc displayed in a museum. Even though her art has been displayed in various museums in NYC, it is very strange that even though our city is so diverse, we have to focus primarily on European and white American art. Why do we have to be given only these options, especially in art school, for inspiration? I find it very odd and disheartening.(one of her painting quilts- the Flag is Bleeding #2)


(Subway Grafitti #3-depicts the diversity of NYC, yet it's slowly disappearing. of course, ironically, the people that don't see what is happening and don't care are white. i don't understand why someone would come here to get away from the area they are from yet hate the way that this city really is like. if you don't like it, then why come here and destroy everything just to make it so other people who aren't from here are comfortable? i have to stop rambling about this...i can probably write a whole book about it...another project added to the lengthy list in the back of my head...)

You can see more of her art here. I really like that she uses different mediums, and she does various "painted quilts". I used to want to do a quilt (I know I'm really a grandma in disguise), but I would like various people to help me with it, but most people don't have the time to do those things anymore (but I have plans...one of those things that I will keep in the back of my head). She also does work on historical events, various scenes of city life, and even children's books. (The Black Light Series:The American Spectrum) (We Came to America)

That's it for now- my hand feels like it's going to fall off....and now I'm just overwhelmed with all of these ideas.

Thinking of trees again...

I was going to stay up and do some work for our painting class, but I got a little bored, and so I thought I could post some inspirational images...





gapingvoid.com
Keri Smith

SARKEdward MonktonKinda old (it was made in 1989), and you might have to click on it to actually read it, but it's by the Guerrilla Girls


These are other images that I saved, but I don't remember who they were by:

Bored during our class break...

Yesterday, we had to discuss each other's projects for our semester projects. I really thought that most people had successful drawings and a good start on their projects, and it was really interesting to see everyone's interpretation of what they wanted to do for this project. I really enjoyed the diversity of everyone's drawings- some people are doing portraits of friends or people in the class, while other people are basing their projects on themselves or the environment that surrounds them.

On the other hand though, I sort of realized that my project is one of the biggest in the class, and I will probably be needing a lot of time to finish this. I can't really make excuses or leave things unfinished, or the house will not look as effective. Also, I have to think of other ways to keep the messages more subtle, but easy enough for people to understand it without asking what the meaning is of every detail since it would just get too confusing for everyone. Some people also liked my trees, especially the one for the "Haunted House".

We are also supposed to do a drawing for homework based on the critiques from yesterday, but I have no idea how I'm going to do this. I could just go along with my original plan for this week and draw out my first house. I will also figure out how to make the house open correctly. I'll update the images later on in the week.

"I myself am...strange and unusual"

I'm up watching Beetlejuice (it's a childhood favorite-Shhh), so I figured I post something now.

My plan so far was to work on the things that I was making outside of the doll house, and then work my way in.

This is part of the cover that some people saw me working on in class almost two weeks ago. It says, "J. Wakefield's Wacky House of Silly Societies". I also attached four different parts to the cover to represent each "house" that I will be making.
This one is really simple, but it is supposed to represent the upper class house. You can barely see it, but attached to the heart is "gold" ring and a girl pendant which represents what obligations people usually have once they marry (more material possessions and children), and the butterfly represents the opposite of that- complete freedom.

I also made some exterior parts for when the house will be put on display for the final critique. I made a simple sidewalk:
I actually made this so it would wrap almost entirely around the opened house. It is also in four different colors, including a yellow part- yes, I did have to include a yellow brick road for my fantasy side of the house.

I also made some trees. They were originally all going to be attached to make one big tree...but it did not come out as planned. They all instead got glued together and it refused to stand up on it's own. I have an idea on how to make them stand up a different way, but I'll figure that out later since they aren't really an important part of the house (it's just to add to the atmosphere of the piece).

Tree1 Side1 (doesn't look too much like a tree, but maybe some kind of weird octopus?)
Side 2: It's reflecting the flash since it has some gold paint on it. Tree 2 Side 1, looks a lot better in person. Tree 2 Side 2- Tree for the "Haunted Mansion", looks more magical than haunted


So, that's everything I'm uploading now. I have some floor plans that I drew for each of the floors for the house, but since they aren't the final product, it seems kind of a waste to show them here at the moment. Tomorrow, I'm going to finish covering the front and back covers so I could get them out of the way before I tackle the interiors of the house. If something happens, and it takes me longer than I planned to finish, the last thing I would want to do is to sew up a book cover. I'm also afraid that my sewing machine is going to chew up the whole thing, so it's best to get that out of the way when I'm less stressed.



I would also like to leave you with this:



Another film I saw tonight, called "Baraka". It is simply the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. It is a film that was made in 1992 that showed different cultures, animals, environments, religions, etc etc from around the world. Some parts are hard to watch, but the whole film is really moving. It is almost like "Planet Earth" except they obviously just don't show animals, and there is no dialogue whatsoever. Also, there are some songs that are sung by one of my favorite bands, Dead Can Dance-which I thought was ironic when they were playing one of their songs when they were showing remains in concentration camps in Auschwitz and in Cambodia. More info about the film here and here, if you like.

Haven't updated in so long...

Since the first day I had my camera, I already knew it didn't like me. It eats through batteries like Pringles, randomly turns off, takes crappy pictures... So basically, that was one of the reasons why I haven't updated this thing in awhile. I also haven't been feeling well, so going on the computer hasn't been on my "to do" list within the last week (I'm already dreading to see how many emails I have to go through later).

Anyway, while I was doing some research for another class, I came upon this one artist named Taylor McKimens. I like his drawings since he not only uses different medias, but also makes these 3 dimensional drawings for depicting everyday objects.
How could you not like that pick-up truck?


I'll be updating with some of drawings I have been doing soon.

Beginning of our projects...

My project is basically going to be a doll house book, which is going to consist of four houses. If this goes as planned, I am hoping that it will be able to stand open as a one house. This is hard to explain since I haven't started drawing the actual house yet, so I'm sure this will sound confusing to some people. In the first two houses, or on one side of the house, will be the realistic side which will show the extremes between living in an upper class family and the lower class. The other side will be more fantasy and child-like. I'm thinking of doing a tree house and then a haunted mansion.

For our homework, I knew I could not just do "one drawing" since my project will be a little different from everyone else's. I wanted to start making some of the exterior parts for the house first so I could get them out of the way. I was in a really crafty mood this weekend, so I first made this sun/moon:
It's on a hanger so it could be attached to the tree (which I will be making tonight) and could hover above the house when it is all set up. I also made a folder that would hold all of the extra parts of the house (which will also include the people and some of the furniture).I also started to dye some paper with the red food coloring again. Some people really liked how it came out, and I thought it would look cute with the doll house. So, this will eventually be the title page for the book.

For this week, I'm hoping to also layout the floor plans and also finish the book cover. I will also need to figure out how I'm going to put together the house properly so it would actually pop out and look 3-D, but that should only take a few minutes since I have some ideas. I don't know how long all of this will take since I really want to take my time and not rush through all of the parts. Yesterday, I probably spent over an hour just on the sun/moon, but I didn't rush myself and was listening to weird spiritual music in the process...

This is funny and cute...

What is art?



i like the printmaking dog....

Quotes Part Deux

(The Moon by Alphonse Mucha)

I posted some quotes almost a month ago, so I'll add some more for the time being.

“I put my heart and my soul into my work, and have lost my mind in the process.”
-Van Gogh

"The world is mud-luscious and puddle-wonderful. "
e. e. cummings

"To restrict the artist is a crime. It is to murder germinating life."
-Egon Schiele

"I love to see a young girl go out and grab the world by the lapels. Life's a bitch. You've got to go out and kick ass."
-Maya Angelou

"Another belief of mine; that everyone else my age is an adult, whereas I am merely in disguise."
-Margaret Atwood

“If you hear a voice within you saying, ''You are not a painter,'' then by all means paint… and that voice will be silenced.”
- Van Gogh

"You must not lose faith in humanity. Humanity is an ocean; if a few drops of the ocean are dirty, the ocean does not become dirty. "
-Mohandas Gandhi

so...

I'll be updating some drawing stuff in a few days. Just trying to figure out the floor plans for my weird dollhouse.
But meanwhile-time for some weird music.

...I was 3 when this song came out...
the world must have been in a weird state in 1990....

Weekend project...

What do you do when your clothes start to fade since you where all black everyday? Dye them black! Yeah...

I also got a new bag (ok it's really used, like most of the things I own), and I also tried dyeing it black. It's still brown though. I guess I need to eventually start wearing other colors. Or not. Many people in my Dad's family wear black almost everyday, so it comes naturally.

Also been trying to think about what to do about our self-guided project. My mind is all over the place again. I was thinking at first to do small assemblage pieces for each person in the class and maybe conducting a survey to see what people's interests are, since I don't talk to some people in the class as much. At the same time though, everyone seems to be doing portraits or something relating to someone they know, so I might do something else. I also have this idea of putting together some kind of doll house so then I could integrate that innocent and weathered look that some people were talking about. It would be really hard to make and carry around a real doll house, but I could try to figure out how to put it together easily. I was also thinking of doing something else with that, but it seems like many people that I know are getting sick of all of this political stuff that is everywhere at the moment (such as with the 2008 presidential voting and primary things that is going on).

Either way, I need some time to think about it some more. Plus, my hands are kinda bluish-gray at the moment due to the black dye. Yay.

*Edit*- I just figured out how I could do a doll house. It might be something different than I usually do, but it might look...nice?

Back by popular demand...

That giant abstract circle folk floor rug hippie beaded thing that I made a few homeworks ago....It's nice having a big white kitchen wall, for these purposes at least.You can see the lemon pictures that were on the wall behind it now. This thing took much longer to make even though I wound up gluing it and not sewing it like I wanted to. My sewing machine decided to not cooperate with me that night. Also, the beading would have taken me forever if I hand sewn all of them, but I only sewed the red ones since I was scared they were going to fall off. The whole thing is still in one piece, but it's still in a little plastic bag since I have no idea where to put it.

Here is the song by a German Industrial/ Experimental band Einsturzende Neubauten which goes along with this piece. This is the real video to it, too, not just some crazy obsessive fan video. The song is called "The Garden".